How Orthodontics Can Actually Improve Your Golf Performance (Yes, Really)

Wait, wait, wait, hear me out first! I haven’t lost my mind, and no the title isn’t a joke. I’m serious guys, like totally and deadly serious. Orthodontics really did improve both my teeth and my golf game. In this post, I’m going to link orthodontics with aesthetics with confidence with sports performance. That’s four items, and three links, so strap on it for a great and unique article.

So let’s start with point number one.

Orthodontics is Aesthetics

This link is of course obvious. Orthodontics is sometimes called cosmetic dentistry or aesthetic dentistry. Despite all the claims about health and yadda yadda yadda, we all know the real reason any of us gets braces; to look good. Anything else is purely secondary, our primary purpose is to simulate the biological fitness marker of well-positioned and straight teeth.

By the way an interesting theory I just read says that our early ancestors actually had very nice and straight teeth. But as we progressed into the agricultural age, sedentary habits set in and resulted in a prevalence of mouth breathing over nasal breathing. Mouth breathing is apparently a bad bad thing, and one of the things it can cause are smaller jaws and thus a mouth that cannot nicely accommodate our full set of teeth. Strange, isn’t it?

Moving on to point number two.

Aesthetics is Confidence

Another obvious one. No matter how much we can kid ourselves about how “looks don’t matter” and how anyone judging others on their looks is shallow, the biological truth is that we are a shallow species. Even when we can recognize this about ourselves and suppress those primal urges, we cannot deny that we still feel them, especially in the form of initial impressions; when the higher brain hasn’t had a chance to fully process the stimulus yet.

We subconsciously realize this. When we judge ourselves as lacking in aesthetics, that same primal brain that recognizes and judges the primal qualities of others also judges ourselves. So we lack that primal confidence; the confidence that comes from aesthetics. This confidence can be replaced by some other (primarily) primal quality such as physical dominance, and social status. Only the enlightened few ever manage to evolve past this stage. And to be honest, chasing primal qualities is fun; we always have to feed the beast within.

Point number three now.

Confidence is Performance

Is there anyone who can reasonably deny this? Has there ever been a successful athlete who wasn’t confident in his or her abilities? And let’s not conflate humbleness with a lack of confidence here, even the most humble successful fighter believes he can and will knock his opponent’s block clean off his shoulders. Also, consider that it is rarer to see a humble successful athlete than a cocky one. Especially the champions; it’s clear that being cocky does not hurt your chances of success.

And why should it? Belief is a powerful thing. I find it almost an oxymoron that a bit of positive self-delusion can be objectively the best course of action. It’s almost a cognitive paradox for me.

Anyway here’s the logical conclusion. To be good at golf, you need to be confident in your abilities. Of course, you have to acquire and constantly work on those abilities in the first place. But still, confidence is just as necessary as ability in order to succeed.

And where can that confidence come from? One source of that confidence can be aesthetics. I don’t know about any studies but I have no doubt that Tiger Woods winning smile played a huge role in his rise to the most famous golfer and pornstar fucker in the world. Especially when contrasted against his beautiful mocha complexion, his teeth really stood out. Like a black Tom Cruise, but not crooked or a midget

I wonder where Tiger Woods got his orthodontic treatment from? I did some research, and apparently he flew all the way to England got the hookup with the best orthodontic centre in Edgbaston, Birmingham. Now I’m thinking of giving it a shot…. Should I?

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